Ray just got a new butler named Mr. Waterbury! I know this because he (Mr. Waterbury) just came over to borrow some musical equipment from Chris (I let him go in and take everything he needed). He was super nice and even called me "young master Philippe"! When he was leaving he said "Thank you, young master Philippe"! I really like him. He has an English accent.
Almost time for bed!
I do not remember if I told you this but yesterday Chris got me a JAYMAR piano! Today I called Ray to ask him if he would give me a piano lesson, and he said he would be happy to. A little while later he came over and he had a lot of really nice after-shave on, and he showed me how to play a "C" scale. I learned it pretty fast, so he said that the boring part of the lesson was over and that it was time to learn a little "showmanship!"
Real fast he stood up and the piano bench fell down behind him, but I could tell that's what he wanted to happen because the whole time he was looking right at me and smiling! He said that Jerry Lee Lewis did that trick and that it was very popular. Then he had me try it.
I sat down and played the "C" scale, and then I stood up real fast while smiling at Ray. I had to practice a few times before I could get the bench to fall over. Ray said to keep practicing, and that he had to go home to watch some TV. I practiced for a long time, and in a little while I got to where I could make the bench fall over almost every other time! I guess the noise bugged Chris because he came in and told me to stop it...but while he was yelling at me my pants fell down! He started laughing and had to walk away, so I guess I'm not in trouble. Why did my pants fall down?
Oh BOY! Chris got me a piano today! It is JAYMAR brand and it sounds just like a real piano, only it is my size! He says he went to a garage sale and that when he saw it he immediately thought of me. I love Chris! He even carried it in from the car and when he put it down he taught me how to play "chopsticks," which is the basic piano song! He said that if I practice chopsticks enough, then he will teach me a really fun song called "Baby Elephant Walk"!
Okay, since it is kind of early everyone is telling me not to play chopsticks on my new piano. I guess I have to wait for a while since everyone in the house is such a lazy-buns.
Love, Philippe!
Usually I ask someone to help me open the big soda bottles, but today Lyle said he thought I was old enough to learn how to do it myself. I asked him if he had any tips and he said to make sure to un-screw the cap as fast as possible so that it didn't explode. This got me pretty nervous. What if I made it explode?
Well, I can be kind of tough so I went ahead and got a brand new big plastic bottle of Strawberry Rite out of the fridge. I didn't know how heavy it would be so I kind of dropped it for a minute. Then I finally got a hold of it, grabbed the cap real tight, and unscrewed it as fast as I could.
I don't remember what happened for the next few seconds, because I got so scared I had a black-out. Lyle says that I didn't do it right, and that the Strawberry Rite shot up into my face like a fountain, and that I panicked and squeezed the bottle so that even more shot out. When I finally woke up, there was only a little Strawberry Rite left in the little bottom bumpy-feet of the bottle, and Lyle had left a paper towel by me.
Anyhow, I have to go take a bath.
I'm so glad Téodor is back! Today he took our Tupperware home popsicle set and made Welch's grape juice popsicles! I have had two already. I can walk around the backyard five times before my popsicle is gone. I found a broken G.I. Joe by the plum tree! He has no legs so I made him a Play-Doh wheelchair! I made it orange and yellow so that it will seem like he is having fun.
Hello, Téodor! Welcome back! I know I just saw you in the hallway but I want to give you Blog Hello's too! I am so happy you are back from your vacation!
When Téodor went to his aunt's house on Monday he left me a little note that said, "Try to make sure that Chris gets risotto as often as possible." He also left me a little bag of rice. Since I don't know how to cook risotto what I did was just use the rice to write "RISOTTO" on Chris's bathroom counter once in a while! It was all I could figure out to do. At least that way Chris would still get to *think* about risotto, even if he could not eat any.
Oh well, when he finishes unpacking maybe he will play frisbee with me in the yard!
Chris put a painting of me on eBay, and he said that people are very happy about it! He said that after it sells, he is going to buy me a Milky Way bar! I don't know why someone would want a painting of me, but I guess I am a nice enough guy that a painting of me wouldn't make people who saw it too mad.
Wow, already 3 o'clock! I guess I am getting kind of lazy in my old age! LOL! :•-)
Do you say things like LOL? I just started learning them. There are a couple other ones you can use, like:
LOL: Laughing Out Loud!
I guess if you are mad at someone you could also say,
NLOL! (Not Laughing Out Loud!)
You know, to show them that what they said made you upset or mad.
I am LOL, though! Don't worry! I love you!
Philippe
Oh, brother! Last night I had the most horrible time, because of what I guess was kind of bad shrimps. Today though I woke up and I was really thirsty so I asked Mr. Bear to pour me lots of glasses of 7-Up and he also made me some tapioca. I guess that did it because I felt 100% better all day! I even got my styro-foam airplane out of the garage and put it together, and I threw it at least three times before one of the wings cracked. It is pretty awesome but it breaks pretty easy so I usually have to get some tape and fix it.
Anyhow, it's a little bit early but I am excited for Saturday! Chris said we might do some gardening and fix up the front yard today, so I am very excited! He wants to repair that part of the yard where the drunk driver drove. I hope he puts in nice bricks and stuff, I really like how new bricks look.
Hello! A couple of days ago Lyle was telling everyone how much food his new restaurant job let him take home, so I asked him if he could bring home some leftover shrimp. (Shrimp are my favorite food, maybe.) Tonight when he got home he pulled a bag full of leftover shrimp and shrimp pieces out of his pocket, and even a little tub of fun red sauce for me to dip them in! I ate them up and was soooo happy.
The bad news is, pretty quick after I ate them I got a really bad pain in my stomach and I knew that there was going to be a problem, so I ran to the bathroom to make sure I didn't make any messes. I don't want to say what I did for the next couple of hours but Mr. Bear was really nice and brought me 7-Up and told me everything would be okay. He had this very nice new hat on, and before he came over to help me each time he would hang it on the doorknob.
I have not done a good job of focusing on this lately. Roast Beef told me though that it is time to get serious, so now I am serious! I did not get to have the Vice President I wanted (Todd) so that is one of my main problems. Maybe I will have Mr. Bear be my Vice President! He is very smart and careful and he would always be a good person to ask advice from. Last summer I lit a firework really close to my face and it blew up and hurt my ears a lot and he gave me hugs until I felt OK. I love Mr. Bear! Hooray for my new Vice President!
Everybody, remember: I am taking all the best ideas of both Democrats and Republicans and I am using none of their bad ideas.
And when I got up just now Lyle was awake and he cooked me some tortillas with butter in a pan! Then he sprinkled salt on them and they were super-tasty. It was so great, and Lyle was being really nice too, and even made me an extra snack of huevos rancheros! He says he got most of the ingredients from the new restaurant he works at. I asked him if tomorrow he would get me some shrimp leftovers! I think shrimp are my favorite food in the world. He said he would try, and that he had seen lots of left-over shrimp tonight!
It was pretty dark last night, and I got lost on the way to find Todd! I thought I was walking to the park but pretty soon I didn't recognize any of the houses or any of the cars in the street. I just walked for hours and hours, hoping I would see our house or the park so I could tell where I was, but things just kept getting less familiar! I think I was the most scared I have ever been in my whole life, but I did the smart thing. I hid in a bush until the sun started to come up and I could tell where the creek was and follow it home. Only, it turns out I didn't need to follow the creek at all, because I was just across the street from our house! I guess I didn't recognize it because Chris's convertible is in the shop and he is driving a Rental.
Wow, I woke up at 11:20PM this morning/tonight! I woke up yesterday! I wonder why I'm waking up so early these days. Oh well, I will try to get a lot done in the early morning hours. I have a lot of chores to do for the week, like weed the garden and sort Chris's socks and fold them together. I guess I'll weed the garden now since that won't wake anyone up. But where is the flashlight? It's always in the kitchen drawer but I just went in and it's not there now. Did I leave it somewhere? Uh oh, I better try to find a new one to replace it before anyone finds out. Maybe Todd can get me one! I will go look for him in the park.
I got up really early yesterday and set out nice breakfast supplies for everyone. Then when no one got up for over three hours, I went to bed to take a nap. When I woke up again, someone had stolen all the food and thrown it on the ground! Also, all the cereal bowls I had used were missing, and the house smelled like Smoking. I am pretty sure that Lyle was Out of Bounds again and that he will get a talking-to. No one is very happy with him, he seems to be in a lot of trouble lately.
Uh oh, there is a show on TV that shows how they make Skittles and I have to go!
Wow, I really woke up early today! It's 2 a.m.! I went to bed at seven because nobody was around so I have gotten lots of good sleep. Now it's time to start the day! Wow, what does someone do at 2 a.m. on Saturday? I know! I will make breakfast for everybody in the house! I will put cereal into bowls and set them all out onto the table, and I will get bread ready in case people want to toast it, and I will get the orange juice out of the fridge. Saturday brunch! Oh, people are going to be so happy! I can't wait for everybody to wake up!
It is super windy right now! The back door is open so the wind is going all through the house and making some of the doors open and close on their own, so it's like ghosts are walking around! I put a sheet over my head and walked real carefully around, making ghost noises, but after a little while I realized that I was the only person in the house. Where is everybody?
So Chris decided not to get a new Ink Jet printer, because he cleaned the one he has and it works ok he says. I was very sad because I stayed up late last night writing down all my ideas for what I would do if I had my own Ink Jet printer. After he told me they would not be getting a new Ink Jet printer, he reminded me that I had not done my chores for the week, so I went out and weeded the garden and since no one could see me I cried a little.
I heard Chris saying that their Ink Jet printer is dying and that they are going to get a new one! When they come back with it I will hang around a lot and ask a lot of questions about the old one and maybe they will notice that I am interested and let me have it! Having an Ink Jet printer would be so fun. I could start a newspaper and make menus for an imaginary restaurant and also my home-made gift certificates would look a lot better! I heard him saying that the ink for it is really expensive, though, so maybe I will have to set up a Pay Pal account. Sheesh, life can really get complicated sometimes! Okay, goodbye!
Chris came home from the store with A & W Cream Soda today! He said he got it just for me because it was on sale. He is so nice! I am going to ask Téodor to put it in a glass with a scoop of vanilla ice cream to make a nice treat. I am pretty tired from working on my tree fort today (Lyle even showed me how to make a "urinal" out of a cut in half plastic soda bottle and some tape! Just for the guys!) so I think a treat would be very nice. Goodbye!
I am so happy! Téodor went down to the Underground to get some guitar strings, and when he came back he also brought me a hot hamburger from Burger King! Burger King hamburgers are my favorite because of the good beef flavor and the hot pickles and mustard inside. I am going to make Téodor some gift certificates for free hugs and also one where I will vacuum his room!
It is such a nice morning already! All of the garbageman stuff is out in the street, all perfect, and I am so excited for when the garbagemen come to take it all away! There are the nice blue bins for glass, the green ones for newspapers, the gray ones for plastic, the regular trash cans for garbage and big green cans for yard waste! I really like watching the different garbage trucks come by for the different kinds of stuff. My favorite is the Recycling guy who comes by to take the glass/cans/cardboard. He jumps out of the truck with his bright green vest on and he seems like a good man who puts his best foot forward. Even though there were three bins of glass bottles this week, he did not get frowny or make a scene. He shook his head a little, to get the sweat off, but that is it. He seems like a very good person.
Tonight I thought of an idea! I put two socks on my arms and pulled them all the way up to my shoulders, and then I put on my cowboy hat (I wanted to wear a police hat but I don't have one), and I ran around the house! People did not understand at first that I was on the H.U.G. S.Q.U.A.D. and that my mission was To Give Hugs Where Hugs Are Needed Most. So then I wrote up a Mission Statement (Téodor told me I should do this) and I passed it around the house. I am also going to post them in the neighborhood.
H.U.G. S.Q.U.A.D.
MISSION STATEMENT
When in the course of events it arises that hugs are needed, the H.U.G. S.Q.U.A.D. is an elite group of Master Huggers who will spring into action. For information on joining the H.U.G. S.Q.U.A.D., please contact Philippe, MH.
I went out in my rollerskates in the back yard today and practiced racing around the big planter box in the middle of the patio. I got going so that I could go around all four corners leaning in pretty good and was pretty excited, so I took my skates off and ran around on the grass! But then I remembered about last night and I felt terrible again. I need to do something nice for Téodor, he is always looking out for me.
I'm sorry everyone. I made a horrible mess in the bed because I got sick from eating too much. Téodor was super nice about it and got me all changed and changed my bed sheets and stuff. He even got me some Pepto-Bismol and tucked me in and read me a story (Gillygoofang, the fish that lays square eggs and swims backwards). When I am better I am going to make him some gift certificates for free room cleanings and laundry loads and stuff.
When I stayed up late watching Flashdance! I was eating a lot of leftover ribs-meat that Téodor had cooked for dinner. It was so tasty, but I think it had a lot of spices on it and now I can't sleep. Every time I lie down I feel hot liquid trying to come up my throat! Like a barf! I would be so sad and scared if I did that, because no one should have to clean up stuff like that. What I would probably do is make a pillow fort around my bed so no one could see the mess, and I would play Books On Tape on my clock radio so that people thought I was busy. I would also open the window. Please don't worry about me.
It's the part where the main lady is doing all of her great new dancing in front of all the old boring professors and she really impresses them! You can tell that they have never seen anything like her dancing before. It's like breakdancing and also ballet, I think. The professors are really happy to see something different, the director makes sure you know this. One of the guys has kind of badly combed hair and a bow tie yet he is still so excited that he is kind of bopping to the rhythm! This is maybe one of the best parts of any movie ever, except for the part where Nemo and his dad get back together. That made me cry, but in a bad way, because my dad is dead.